For everybody struggeling with mental health right now: hang in there. #Depression is a liar that make us think bad stuff about ourselves, others and the world and we tend to believe all of that is real and it'll never get better. That's a lie. You are valuable and you deserve to be loved. It's going to get better! #NotJustSad
@AzureKingfisher thank you for this. I'm struggling with depression
@DJWalnut I'm sorry you go through this. Depression sucks so much.
depression, suicide
@AzureKingfisher yeah, fuck this shit. I have no energy ever, I failed at college this last semester that I'm anxious to even look at the problem anymore, every rare while I have to deal with suicidal thoughts. I have no energy for the things I want to do, not the things I need to do. things as easy as basic household chores to as hard as difficult CS projects never get done. depression is ruining my life, and I've only just admitted that to myself
depression, suicide
@DJWalnut and it's not your fault. I experienced having energy like a healthy person for the first time in years last Spring (still don't know how I got there and it faded after some weeks) and it made it a bit easier for me to understand and not blame myself so much for not achieving things. It was like "ah, that's how normal people get all those things done". I couldn't have imagined one could have so much energy. #NotJustSad
re: depression, suicide
@DJWalnut it helps me a lot not blaming myself all the time. I still do it a lot but I'm getting better at stopping.
re: depression, suicide
@AzureKingfisher same here. the protestant work ethic is baked deep into american culture, and every else believes it too. I knew systemic oppression existed, I just didn't think it happened to me specifically
re: depression, suicide
@AzureKingfisher I've been trying to not blame myself for it. in years past, I blamed myself for being lazy, assuming that I was just supposed to power through it and that I didn't have depression at all. then, around the same time I hatched, I acknowledged that there was an issue, but I underestimated how bad it was. only as recently as this month have I realized that yes I'm suffering and my problems are real and severe and that none of it is really my fault for not doing the right things or trying hard enough.